You'll Never See Me Naked

comics, essays, and more from an anxious, androgynous, aromantic, atheist asexual with adhd

Author: M.D. Christopher

The artist, a young woman with short hair wearing a purple shirt, sits in the middle between an anthropomorphic representation of her virginity and the ghost of William Faulkner. She has her laptop open in front of her and her fingers steepled in front of her mouth, having just made an amazing discovery. "So if I write 100 stories, I can put an ace character in every single one." The ghost of William Faulkner replies, "That's not how math works," to which the V-Card, a rectangle with arms and legs and a red V down the front, looks up from its book to say, "What do you expect? She majored in creative writing."

Essays

Matters of Representation (Because Representation Matters)

It’s no small thing to see yourself positively reflected in something someone else has made. It’s proof that you’re not alone, that you’re not broken, or wrong, or any of the other things we tell ourselves when we grow up and don’t see a friendly face in society’s mirror.

In the first panel, the artist, a young woman with short hair wearing a purple t-shirt, holds up a hand and says, "Okay, let me make sure I understand."

Comics

Time Management

I realized I was probably aromantic when the idea of dating became a chore rather than a goal.

Single panel comic with the title 'Asexual Candy Hearts.' The candy hearts are in shades of purple and grey. Counter-clockwise from the top they have the following messages in cutesy abbreviated text speak: 'No Thanks,' 'Love Does Not Equal Sex,' 'Ace It,' 'No Fucks Given,' and 'Challenge the Conventional Wisdom of How Relationships are Supposed to Work,' which is a quote from ACE by Angela Chen.

Comics

Start a Conversation

This Valentine’s Day, tell your crush you don’t want to have sex with them with a quote from ACE by Angela Chen.

In the first panel, in shades of grey with accents of red, a muppet-esque character dressed like a puritan with a scarlet letter A on her clothes, says, "I don't know about this Scarlet Letter skit, M.C. Are you sure it's a good idea to teach kids about adultery?" She's addressing the artist, a young woman with short hair, wearing a purple shirt with a red A badge, whose hands are on her hips.

Comics

The Scarlet Letters

Adultery isn’t the only word beginning with ‘A’ that no one wants to talk about.

The first panel shows the artist, a young woman with short hair wearing a purple tshirt and dark grey pants, walking alongside the anthropomorphic representation of her virginity, a rectangle with arms and legs and a large red V down the front. The artist carries a paper bag with a red plus sign on the outside and complains, "It's scary that so many places are trying to restrict access to birth control. God forbid women have hobbies."

Comics

You’re Welcome

I no longer have to hunt villagers while taking persistent bleed damage, in order to satisfy my hormone-fueled bloodlust. Win-win.

The first panel has the title, "Colorful Euphemisms for having your PERIOD," with 'period' in red all-caps. Below that the caption reads, "Because we're not supposed to talk about menstruation."

Comics

The Bloodening

Running of the bulls. Falling to the Dark Side. The Hunt for Red October. Down at Fraggle Rock. I could do this all day.

In the first panel, in shades of grey, the artist - a young woman with short hair, wearing a purple t-shirt - stands with one hand on her hip, facing a sneering man in a suit with his arms crossed who doesn't look at her. The title above them says, "Shit People Say to Asexuals." The man in the suit is saying, "You know that's not really a thing, right?" The artist responds, "Well, thank goodness you said something before my complete lack of sexual attraction got out of hand."

Comics

Sticks & Stones

I don’t usually have the presence of mind to get it right in the moment, so I made this comic.

In the first panel, in shades of grey with spots of bright green, the caption reads, "I wish there was a big box store for gender expression outside the 'norm.'" Below that is a cartoon character comprised of both the symbols for male and female with a speaker for a mouth that says, "Welcome to Gender-Mart. Gender is construct, let's get building!" A stack of bright green Gender-Mat shopping baskets sits at its feet.

Comics

Choose Your Own Adventure

I frequently wish there was a place where I could exchange my uterus for something useful – like a toaster oven.