You'll Never See Me Naked

comics, essays, and more from an anxious, androgynous, aromantic, atheist asexual with adhd

Tagged: asexuality

In the first panel, in shades of grey with spots of bright green, the caption reads, "I wish there was a big box store for gender expression outside the 'norm.'" Below that is a cartoon character comprised of both the symbols for male and female with a speaker for a mouth that says, "Welcome to Gender-Mart. Gender is construct, let's get building!" A stack of bright green Gender-Mat shopping baskets sits at its feet.

Comics

Choose Your Own Adventure

I frequently wish there was a place where I could exchange my uterus for something useful – like a toaster oven.

The first panel, in shades of grey, shows the interior of a temple, with a golden book sitting on a plinth in a beam of light. A shadow is silhouetted in the doorway beyond. The caption reads, "After decades of searching..."

Comics

Legend of the Hidden Handbook

I can’t be the only person who wishes there was a manual of extremely detailed instructions on how to navigate every single social interaction with ease no matter the cultural, religious, or gender divides.

The first panel, in shades of grey, shows a sheet of paper, blank except for 'YNSMN Ideas' written at the top.

Comics

Cartoonist Woes

Coming up with slice-of-life webcomic content when you live a dull, introverted existence in the middle of a pandemic is tough sometimes.

In the first panel, in shades of grey, the artist - a young woman with short hair wearing a purple shirt - holds a microphone. She appears to be standing in a spotlight in front of a curtain as she says, "If you're new here, you might be asking - what the hell is 'asexual?'"

Comics

Another Stand-Up Comic

I’m probably not getting a set at the Improv any time soon, but this material kills in my apartment.

In the first panel, in shades of grey, the artist - a young woman with short hair wearing a purple shirt - holds a microphone and appears to be standing in a spotlight in front of a curtain. She says, "When I first came out as asexual, I identified as 'romantic.'"

Comics

My Tight Ten

Sometimes, especially after binge-watching The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, I imagine a career in stand-up comedy.

In the first panel, against a light lavender background, a speech bubble says, "Hey kids! It's time for the incredible adventures of" leading into the stylized title 'The Invisible Ace,' with a spade around the 'A' in Ace.

Comics

My Superpower

When asked what superpower I’d like to have, I always say teleportation – because I already have invisibility and I hate driving.

The first panel, in shades of grey and purple, shows the artist, a young woman with short hair wearing a purple t-shirt, holding a card and a stamp in her left hand. She says, "Let's see - I taught myself to crochet last week, so...I think...yes-"

Comics

Consolation Prize

In Shakespeare’s time, leading apes into hell was the fate that awaited old maids.

The first panel shows a rack of assorted clothing. They've been colored with the shades of various pride flags. The caption says, "For me, labels are like clothing."

Comics

Outfit Yourself

This is essentially a long way of saying I think labels are best if you choose them yourself.